A Lot of Men Think Something Is Wrong With Them. It Might Be Hormones.
- Christine Walter
- 4 days ago
- 4 min read
Many men wonder, “Do men have menopause?” While men do not experience menopause in the same way women do, research shows a gradual decline in testosterone — often referred to as andropause or late-onset hypogonadism — can significantly impact mood, energy, libido, cognition, and relationships as men age. Testosterone levels typically decline by about 1–2% per year after age 30, and lower levels have been associated with fatigue, irritability, low motivation, depression-like symptoms, and cognitive changes such as brain fog. Unlike female menopause, male hormonal changes happen slowly and vary widely, which is why symptoms are often overlooked or misattributed to stress, burnout, or aging. Understanding the science behind male hormonal shifts helps men — and their partners — approach these changes with clarity, compassion, and effective support.
The Thing No One Prepared Men For
Most men don’t wake up one day and think, “This must be hormones.”
They think:
I’m tired all the time.
I’m more irritable than I used to be.
I feel flat or disconnected.
I don’t want sex the same way.
I’ve lost my drive.
What’s wrong with me?
They assume it’s stress. Or aging. Or burnout. Or personal failure.
What almost never crosses their mind is this:
Their hormones may be changing — and no one ever told them what that could look like.
So… Do Men Have Menopause?
No — men do not experience menopause the way women do.
There is no sudden shutdown of hormone production. No single biological event. No clear milestone.
But here’s the part that matters:
Men experience a gradual, clinically significant decline in testosterone and related hormones that can affect emotional regulation, motivation, energy, sexuality, and relationships.
This process is commonly called:
Andropause
Age-related testosterone decline
Late-onset hypogonadism
The name matters less than the lived experience.
What Research Shows About Testosterone and Male Well-Being
Testosterone is not just a “sex hormone.”
Research shows it plays a role in:
Mood regulation
Energy and vitality
Motivation and reward processing
Cognitive function
Emotional resilience
Sexual health
Large reviews in endocrinology journals confirm that testosterone levels decline gradually with age and that lower levels are associated with depressive symptoms, fatigue, reduced quality of life, and relationship strain.
Springer – Age-Related Testosterone Decline
Psychology Research – Testosterone & Mental Health
What Hormonal Changes in Men Can Actually Look Like
Many men never connect these symptoms to hormones:
Emotional & Psychological Symptoms
Irritability or increased anger
Emotional numbness or flatness
Anxiety
Depressive symptoms
Reduced stress tolerance
Withdrawal from relationships
Loss of motivation or purpose
Feeling “not like myself anymore”
Cognitive Symptoms
Brain fog
Difficulty focusing
Slower mental processing
Trouble initiating tasks
Reduced mental stamina
Physical Symptoms
Chronic fatigue
Reduced muscle mass
Increased body fat
Decreased stamina
Poor sleep quality
Sexual & Relational Symptoms
Reduced libido
Erectile changes
Less interest in intimacy
Increased shame or avoidance
Relationship strain tied to emotional withdrawal
Many men read this list and think:
I thought this was just me.
It isn’t.
If This Sounds Familiar, You’re Not Alone
Many men recognize themselves here:
You feel less driven than you used to
Stress hits harder and lasts longer
You’re quicker to anger or shutdown
You want to be present but feel depleted
Your partner says you seem distant
You don’t feel like the best version of yourself anymore
None of this means you’re broken.
It means something in your system may be changing — and ignoring it often makes things worse.
Why This Is So Often Missed
1. Men Are Socialized to Push Through
Men are taught to override discomfort, not investigate it.
Hormonal distress gets mislabeled as:
Weakness
Laziness
Attitude problems
Burnout
Instead of being recognized as a biological shift affecting emotional regulation and energy.
2. There Is No Clear “Event”
Women have menopause.
Men have a slow drift.
Without a clear marker, changes are easier to dismiss — until relationships absorb the cost.
3. Medicine Often Focuses on One Symptom
Unless sexual dysfunction is present, testosterone-related symptoms are frequently overlooked.
Mood, motivation, and relational changes get treated as psychological or character issues instead of whole-system issues.
How Male Hormonal Changes Affect Relationships
Partners often notice the changes first.
They may experience:
Emotional distance
Reduced communication
Increased irritability
Loss of intimacy
A sense of “losing” their partner
Men, meanwhile, often feel:
Ashamed
Confused
Less capable
Afraid of appearing weak
Unsure how to talk about what’s happening
Journal of Sexual Medicine – Hormones & Relationship Health
If you’re a partner reading this and thinking, “This explains so much,” you’re not imagining it.
The Hopeful Truth: This Is One of the Most Addressable Midlife Issues
Here’s the research-aligned good news:
When men understand what’s happening and get appropriate support, outcomes improve.
Men often report:
Better mood
More energy
Increased motivation
Greater emotional presence
Stronger relationships
Higher life satisfaction
Support doesn’t mean “just take hormones.”
It often includes:
Medical evaluation when appropriate
Stress and sleep regulation
Movement and nutrition
Mental health support
Coaching or therapy
Relational skill-building
The goal isn’t to go back to who you were at 25.
It’s to adapt wisely to who you are now.
This Isn’t a Men vs. Women Conversation
This is a human hormone conversation.
Women experience dramatic hormonal transitions. Men experience gradual but impactful ones.
Both affect mood. Both affect identity. Both affect relationships.
Understanding this doesn’t excuse harm.
It creates responsibility with compassion — and relationships do better in compassion.
Many men don’t need to “push through.”
They need context. Language. Permission to adapt.
Understanding what’s happening doesn’t make men weaker.
It makes connection possible again.
If you want to explore how hormonal shifts — female or male — interact with stress, behavior, and relationships, I share education and coaching resources at christinewaltercoaching.com.
Want a simple way to reflect on what might be changing? This worksheet helps men—and their partners—notice patterns and start conversations without blame.
Comments