Updated: Jun 12, 2018
Do you feel isolated and lonely in your relationships?
Is there an emptiness that haunts you when you are with others?
Are you unhappy with the level of intimacy and connection in your romantic relationships?
If you answered YES to any of these questions you are not alone. Your expectations may not be aligned with the reality of today's world and the incessant desire for validation on a global and personal scale. Our culture is destroying intimacy and the consequences are catastrophic. The number of addictions, mental illnesses, and suicides appear to be increasing by the days. The challenges you face in your career and primary relationship are like never before. Technology is making it appear that you are easily replaceable in both areas of life. Your boss can easily find someone to do your job and your partner can swipe right in one second to begin their next idealistic romance.
To be successful in today's world we receive messages constantly that we must be seen and heard. The idea that you should post constantly on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram to be visible to the world offers a promise of validation and worth to your existence with a strange twist. Social media has both connected and isolated us from one another. One doesn't need to believe it in order for this to be true, it's happening. Many people feel pressure to create an external identity that may not represent who they truly are yet receive the most amount of likes for a meaningless post that goes against their integrity. The company you work for, the business you are building and your current partner may influence what sides of yourself you allow to show on social media. It reminds me of a global high school of sorts. "Adult-ing" has become a regular word that people in their 30's and 40's use to insinuate a normal responsible task that feels like an accomplishment and the hope to be rewarded for it. The good news is you aren't in high school anymore. You have had personal and professional experiences that have shaped your current wisdom and taught you what true success feels like. Life is challenging and uncomfortable in moments and there is no way to escape all the emotions involved on it's path.
The pain of being unseen and unheard in all relationships is real.
The fear that the emotions will remain causes further isolation and sometimes a state of complete withdrawal from your partner, family and friends. Feelings of isolation, emptiness and doubt are natural. The meaning you give these feelings is how your maturity has an opportunity to surface. They are indicators that point to something more expansive and mysterious. The something more is two-fold: there is more to you than you know AND there is simply more than just you in this world. The challenge of being a mature loving person in all your relationships is a huge responsibility that requires resilience and persistence. Aligning with your feelings and validating them yourself invites closeness and makes space to create a new story where you can be seen and heard clearly. You have a choice in every moment to be that honest and free, it may be scary but the alternative is to let someone else define who you are.
It takes courage to own your feelings and share the ones you struggle with.
Transform your vulnerability into personal power!
To figure out how to navigate your emotions and take the first steps towards creating healthy and fulfilling relationships in your personal and professional life, contact Christine Walter at #ChristineWalterCoaching.com